It's never easy, especially when
you've built your lives around each other and you thought it would last
forever. Before you end a long-term relationship, make sure you've done all
you can to salvage it. In addition to solution-based communication
(rather than just complaining) and counseling.
Totally commit to doing all you can for physical and spiritual self-improvement, such as daily exercise, avoiding processed foods and sugar, and regular meditation.
This will help you realize the best in both of you, which may bring you
closer together. If not, you'll be able to part on friendlier terms. If
your partner is not willing to participate, it may be another
indication that it's over.
Next, be absolutely certain before you end a long-term relationship.
Once you are certain it's over, here's how not to end a long-term relationship:
1) Cheat--If you do this it will just cause more conflict and everyone will blame the demise of your relationship on infidelity,
which is often only a symptom of the other problems. That aside, it's
interesting that few people ever blame the end of a long-term
relationship on strict monogamy.
2) Delay ending the relationship because you don't want to hurt him. It will just be more difficult the longer you wait.
3) Be a jerk, hoping she will dump you. This creates even more problems.
4) Fail to communicate about the problems.
5) Pretend everything is fine and then leave without any explanation.
This is cowardly, unfair to your ex, and will cause you negative karma.
How to end a long-term relationship, when you are ready to make the announcement:
1) Choose the right time and place.
2) Be direct, yet polite and compassionate, even if he is not. Avoid
criticizing and blaming. You don't want to create any negative karma in
the process of leaving (the act of breaking-up itself does not).
3) Remind her that you've done all you can, you two are not compatible
enough for a relationship, it's best to move on, and that if you remain
together, it will prevent you both from finding people who are more
compatible.
Now that you have a better idea about how to end a long-term
relationship, you can help your partner and yourself do so in the best
way possible.
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