It
is very difficult to sit with a group of your friends and hear their
stories and experiences that are taking place in their relationships -
especially if you’re on your own. It will make you look at your life and
wonder just how it is that you’re still single while
all of your friends your age are married or at least in serious
relationships. You start to feel down, depressed, frustrated and wonder
if you’ll ever have what they do.
Have you ever thought that this could be something that you’ve brought on yourself? There are actually fears that can keep you single and you may not even know that you have them.
You
may be afraid that you will be single forever. This is something that
many single people fear whether they admit it or not. It usually happens
when you’ve had a few, or more than a few, unpleasant or seriously
awful relationships, especially in a row. Somewhere in the back of your
mind you’re thinking that you may NEVER have that just right
relationship. This can really worry you if it’s later in your life than
you thought you’d be single. Men can tell when a woman is desperate and scared to be on her own.
Sensing this can change the way a man feels toward you. So, you see,
holding onto this fear that you’ll never meet the Mr. Right may very
well push him away when he DOES show up.
Another fear that can keep you single is the fear of losing your man.
Most people are on their best behavior when they first meet. However,
there are some guys that act creepy right out of the gate by assuming
too much about where your relationship is going. They may even start
getting possessive and/or controlling. Women that exhibit this same type
of behavior with men after only a few dates will scare those men away.
So when you start worrying about losing the guy before you ever really
connect with him, it can make you act in ways that, while totally
uncharacteristic of you, can cause the end of this relationship before
it even starts.
One of the top fears that might keep you single forever is that he will turn out to be just like your ex.
This is pretty easy to understand. If your last relationship ended
badly, you need to take enough time to get emotionally under control
again. When you give it enough time, then your next man will get a fair
chance without you comparing him to your ex. Breaking the emotional ties
to your past, and the fear associated with it, helps you move away from
the past without taking any old problems or patterns into the new
relationship you’re trying to get off the ground.
Be very honest about whether or not you have these fears. Only by admitting to them can you start getting rid of them.
